Forbidden (part one)

  This is a story of mine, I wrote couple of years ago. I wrote it in Serbian, so I had to translate it in English and I hope I did okay. The story is completely fictional. Enjoy!

"I never met my dad. However, there was I, sitting in a waiting room outside his office on the last floor of a very high skyscraper located at the city center. His secretary was a blond girl my age with a great body, but not very beautiful. I wondered whether my father gave her a job because he wanted to bang her or because he was doing it already. I didn't want to think about that at the moment and tried to focus. I came there for a different, much more important reason - my wedding. "You may come in" said his secretary and continued surfing the net. Holly crap his office was huge. I thought it to be smaller than that, him being junior partner in that big international firm. I sat across his desk and continued waiting. Few moments later, door opened behind me and I heard female voice asking: "Would you like something to drink?" I turned around to answer and saw a tall, athletic man, too hot to be forty. His face lit up: "I can't believe you're really here. Wow, look how much you've grown!" I smiled. "I hope I'm not interrupting your plans. I just decided to drop by." "No, you're not interrupting anything. I just wasn't expecting you." I explained I was getting married and wanted to invite him to the wedding. Even though we never met, he was sending me money whenever necessary. "You're already getting married?! You just turned 20!"

He and mom never actually got married, but when they got together they were around my age. They both think all of that was a horrible mistake. He left so that mom could find somebody else, someone who could actually be my dad and take care of us both. He kept sending me money even when mom found John. "I'm happy with Philip. I trust him and I feel safe with him." "Where is love in there?", he asked me when we sat in the corner of  a restaurant he eats at every day. It took us five minutes to get there with his brand new Lexus. If nothing else, he has a great taste in cars. "Love? Oh, he really does love me. I'm sure I couldn't have found a better man." He never asked me anything else about the wedding, nor Philip and me.

Three hours later, I was at home and I couldn't believe how the time flew by. Philip already came home from work. While he was eating, I told him how it went with Daniel. It reminded me to put him on the guest list, but I realized I don't know whether he's coming alone or with someone. I haven't seen a ring on his hand, but as far as I was concerned he could be gay. I decided to call him and arrange to meet. We wanted to meet a couple of times before the wedding, so we could catch up. This time we went to his favorite restaurant. "Ha ha ha! You're amazing!", he couldn't stop smiling. And his smile was enchanting! I had to remind myself that he's my father and that I'm getting married in less than a month. The fact that he's coming to the wedding alone didn't help.

I couldn't sleep all night. Philip wanted sex but I wasn't up for it, which wasn't like me. Tomorrow morning, I sent him off to work. I called the florist, and just as somebody picked up the phone, I heard a car horn and looked out the window. There was Daniel, leaning on his Lexus calling me to come downstairs. He took me to his yacht, which he named after me. It was incredible on the water. We talked for hours. He even taught me how to drive the yacht. We were lying in the sun as it was setting.

 Then he asked me whether I love Philip. His question made me come back to reality. We just sat in silence for a while. Then I said that I'm not sure and that I care about him. "Don't marry him. I don't want you to do that just because you feel like you owe him something. I want you to be happy." I don't know what came over me, but I started yelling at him: "Who are you to tell me that?! My whole life you weren't around, and now you're telling me what to do and how to be happy!" I was so mad and wanted to yell some more, but he got closer to me and put his lips on mine. He smelled so good and his lips were soft and before I realized what was happening we were widely and uncontrollably kissing each other. "Stop. This is wrong. You're my daughter. This wasn't supposed to happen. I'll drive you home." "No, you're not. I want this. I'm happy now." I leaned closer to him and looked him in his eyes. I felt his breath on my lips. He kissed me again, and I knew we crossed the line and we couldn't go back. I knew nothing would ever be the same.

I'll always remember the first time his strong hands touched my skin. His fingers were slowly going across my body, feather-like caressing my hands, my back, my legs exploring under my dress. We went below deck in the bedroom. I'll always remember the first time he put his thick cock inside me. He put his head inside me and god I could have cummed right then, it spread me so wide and my pussy gripped it so hard. He slowly put more of it inside me until no more would fit and it started to hurt a little. He thrust in and out, again and again. He pulled out abruptly and propped me up on the edge of the bed and started coming at me from the front. He was such a man...so big and muscular all around, I thought that no guy in the world could be so sexually powerful. He put it inside me again and I almost came. It looked so nice as it went deeper and deeper inside of me and made so much noise from the friction. He started to rub my clit with his hand while he thrusted harder and faster inside me. He made me feel things I'd never felt before. I felt so good it was almost scary. I'd never felt such a high.

It was so late when I got home. I couldn't think clearly about anything. I didn't bother explaining anything to Philip. I said I didn't call because my phone broke and I needed a new one. He asked nothing else. I felt so guilty and sorry and angry at myself. My feelings were mixed and I was confused. I immediately went to bed and passed out. Tomorrow I spent preparing everything for the wedding, trying to keep myself busy and sorting things out in my head. On Monday, I called Daniel and told him I wanted to talk. I wanted to hear his thoughts about all this. He picked me up and we went to his place. We didn't get the chance to talk much. This time everything was more gently and tender, but just as mind blowing as before. He said he wanted to let me think about everything and he didn't want to pressure me in any way. He added that if I decide to stay with Philip, he wouldn't be able to come to the wedding, or see me ever again.

I came home and Philip was there. He wanted to surprise me and he took a week off just to be with me and help with the wedding preparations. He didn't ask where I was, so I assumed he thought I was on a dress rehearsal or something like that. We spent the whole week together. We were busy, but my thoughts would often wander to Daniel. I missed being with him so much. On Sunday, while I was having sex with Philip I whispered Daniel's name. Philip froze. Apparently, this wasn't the first time I said his name. I was talking in my sleep a few times before. Then he just stood up, took his clothes and walked out. I couldn't make myself go after him. I couldn't make myself look him in the eyes.

In the morning, before work, he came to me and said he would leave if it makes me happy. And if I want him to stay, he will, but only if I never see Daniel or speak of him again. He said he loves me and he will do anything to make me happy. I ran in the bathroom and started crying uncontrollably. I was so confused and sorry about everything. I knew what I needed to do, but I just couldn't. I love Daniel and I always will. I could have walked away if he didn't want me, but with his desire for me and me wanting him so badly it's terrible. I was torn apart. I couldn't do what needed to be done. How could I let this happen? Now when I was supposed to get married.

Philip was at work, so I called Daniel over. I was hoping I would be able to explain everything and tell him I'm disappearing from his life. When he came and saw me all tearful, suffering and pain spread through his face. He hugged me and started comforting me and I couldn't say a word. He was full of understanding and quietly said I was never gonna see him again. As those words came out his mouth I felt like part of me was ripped out. I was in physical pain. Everything hurt. I hugged him strongly and wouldn't let go. I told him: "Don't you dare leave me! I forbid you to leave!" He was surprised with my decision, but he was relieved:" Don't worry. I'm there. I'll never leave you again." With these words I managed to calm down and I fell asleep in his arms.

I woke up in my bed. Daniel already left and Philip was there. I gathered my strength and told him I can't leave Daniel and that I don't wanna torture him anymore. "If you want to leave, you can and I would understand. I really want you to be happy." He was desperate. He wasn't expecting that at all. "I love you. I can't just go away never to return. I knew you didn't love me like I did, but I was hoping there was a chance, that in time perhaps that would change..." His voice broke. "You will find a beautiful girl some day. Better than me. Someone who deserves you and who will love you with all her heart." He kissed me for the last time and went away. I never saw him again."

Can't run away

Yesterday my sister and I went out with Jerk and Mr. Nice (I wrote something about it before). Jerk and I wanted to get the other two together, give them an excuse to see each other, so they can hook up. Everybody knows that my sister has a crush on him, even he knows it. So I ended up with my ex trying to help Mr. Nice to make a move on Marija. It was really weird. Jerk has been in a happy relationship 6 months so far and they're making plans to go on vacation together. And I have a bogus boyfriend for a couple of weeks now. (I hooked up with an amazing guy and he wanted to be with me, but I'm the one that's always texting him and calling him and he never mentions that he wants to see me but sends me hugs and kisses, and now he is visiting his parents in another town so I'm not entirely sure whether I have a boyfriend or not, but if I run into someone better I'm going for it.)

Anyways, I started remembering why liked Jerk in the first place and why I ended up with him. I had to focus really hard so I wouldn't say or do something wrong. I realized I miss being with him. I just wanted for him to say: "You know what? Screw my girlfriend, let's try again." I knew this was never gonna happen. Not when he's committed. I also know that getting back together with him is completely wrong and not good for me at all. I'm hoping I'll find somebody to want and love soon. I can't keep doing this much longer. I had to agree to go watch an old french movie with him, Breathless I think it's called. Just the two of us. That's gonna be interesting. I never went to the movies with a guy before, not even with a guy friend, let alone on a date.  It's gonna hurt like hell, being with him alone like that. However I can pull it off, I'm strong enough. I have to be.

Results!

I finally got the results, after two weeks of waiting. It felt like forever, but at the same time didn't want to know and it passed so quickly. Anyways, I'm extremely happy the waiting is over and I passed. I got 7.5 out of 9 which isn't that bad. I got maximum points in reading and listening, but did horrible in writing and got 6.

Now I need to pick up the results on Monday and send them to Australia. I can't believe that it's really happening. I really am going to Melbourne. The worst thing now is packing. I need to start preparing myself immediately. I can't imagine worse thing than having to decide which things to leave behind and which to take.

In a few months I will be on a plane, not knowing what to expect. It's going to be my first time on a plane. I wonder how that's gonna work out. All in all, I'm going on an adventure and probably never coming back. (I'm freaking out a little bit.) Aussies look out Liksi is coming!

What about love?

When I was a little girl I wanted to be a pretty princess. I wanted to marry a handsome prince and live in a big beautiful castle. I wanted to have lots of children and live happily ever after. I was a girly girl and was into romance. My mom remembers me saying that when you fall in love with somebody, it's for life (I was five and in kindergarten).

As I grew up, somewhere along the way, I changed my mind radically. For years I have been fooling around with guys never wanting anything more than a little bit of fun. I wanted to trow up every time someone mentioned candles, roses, anything romantic.

8 months ago I hooked up with Jerk and decided to stay with him as long as I can. Nobody believed I'd last longer than a month. But I did. I didn't fell in love, I just liked being in a relationship. During the time I was with Jerk, I started awakening. I don't care what others think about it, but I believe that there is someone out there for me and that love does exist. Love will find me and when it comes I'll fight for it.

The one thing I don't understand is why we see people in love in movies and books only? That is very sad. The number of people who believe in love is getting smaller by the day. And the number of people getting a divorce is rising by the day. In my opinion that is extremely wrong. No wonder I forgot all about feelings while I was growing up. Don't let that happen to you. Open your mind and heart for love. It will come and you need to be ready when it does.

Learn from the past...

Places to go...

I would have to add Ibiza, Miami, Monaco and French Riviera. One day I will visit all these cities! ^_^

Baby dolls

This is a very weird picture...

Update + friends...

This weekend I finally finished my exams in English. I'll get the results in about two weeks and I can't wait. I quit my job, because I had to be in the club every day of the week because of the meetings and such, but I got payed for one night only. And they wanted me to go out with the guests in my free time, in order to make them come to the club just because of me... In other words to make them regulars. No way I was gonna do that. So now I don't work and I don't study. I'm looking for a job, but it might take some time to find one. In the meantime I'll write more and go out with my friends, which is in fact great. And talking about friends, I must admit mine are very interesting.

Day before yesterday I went out with them and my sister. The guys were asking us girls about all kinds of things, what do girls generally like and dislike. I'm just gonna write all the questions and answers I can remember:
Q: Do you like when guy approaches you or not?
A: Of course we do! It shows us that he's confident and that's cool.
Q: And if you say no to that guy, does that really means no?
A: No means no. Always. We're not playing hard to get, we just dislike you if we say no.
Q: And there is no way that, after you get to know someone, that no can become yes?
A: If we aren't attracted sexually to that person that will never happen. The worst thing is when your friend or even best friend says that he likes you more than just a friend. (I personally lost a few great friends because of that)
Q: So it's better to say how you feel in the beginning than to wait and hope things will change and she would like you more?
A: Yes. You should say everything in the beginning.
Q: And if the guy that approached you is drunk, how would you react?
A: We would just tell him to go away and that we aren't interested.
Q: And if he isn't drunk but smells like beer?
A: It depends on a lot of things. Whether he's hot or not, whether we like him, whether he's funny...

I cant remember other questions, but they were similar to these. The last question was the most interesting and the answer was different for every girl. They asked what did we think about them when we first met and who did we like the most. Naturally, we made them to tell us first. I already knew what my ex (Jerk) thought. He was attracted to me, but he was sure I was never gonna agree to be with him. He said that I was like queen bee, It girl, the most popular girl whose boyfriend is a hot football player. He wasn't far from the truth, but I liked him so we hooked up anyway. None of the other girls liked him, let alone liked, liked him.

One guy (from now on known as Mr. Nice) said that he liked me most and perhaps one more girl. I was very surprised to hear that. We used to go to school together when we were little. We weren't friends back then and we haven't seen each other for ages. I always assumed he thought of me as the girl who he went to school with. I had no idea that he liked me. When we met (for the second time) he was already my friends ex (they stayed friends and that's how all of us met). In the meantime he hooked up with that other girl who he liked besides me. (The third guys choice was also her.) I don't know if he still likes me. However, I know that my sister likes him. And she's gonna make a move pretty soon. And he is a hot guy. (And his zodiac sign is cancer and ascendant lion, just like my ex who was the first and hopefully the last who dumped me.) In other words, I like him, which is crazy and bad and horrible.

Since other guys weren't there it was our turn. My answer to that question was that I liked everybody. Every single one of them has something that I like. They are all taller than me, which is the most important for me. I've never been with someone smaller than me. And I've hooked up with a lot of guys. Anyways, some of my guy friends are extremely hot, well most of them are. They are all smart and funny. I always wonder how did they found each other. I would be with every single one of them. And there are five of them. Well, four actually. I would never be with Jerk again.

One time, all of us were at my house and we were celebrating orthodox (Serbian) new year which is on the 13th January. And after a lot of drinking we started playing Spin the bottle. Not all of us were there, 3 guys (two from the text above, not my ex) and 5 girls (3 friends, my sister and I). We ended up kissing each other, spanking,  and doing all kinds of things (there was no nudity involved). There was girl on girl kissing involved, which was nothing new for us girls, but the boys went crazy. We even persuaded two of the guys to kiss for 30seconds. It was priceless. To sum up, I kissed 3 out of 5. One of them is the worst kisser ever, but best looking compared to other four. Life isn't fair.

That's it from me for now...
Peace and out!

The sun!

It's spring and it's sunny! I'm soooo happy and ecstatic and can't wait to go out and enjoy the day!

Rapid progress in the fields of genetics and gene therapy are likely to have profound effects on people’s lives in the foreseeable future. By altering people’s genetic make-up, it may be possible for doctors to cure hereditary diseases, and for parents to choose important characteristics for their children such as their sex or level of intelligence. Such a development would be a major breakthrough for humanity and would solve many present-day problems.

Genetically enhanced people have been seen only in books and movies so far, but with the fast development in genetics nowadays, it’s just a matter of time when they will become reality. Until that happens, the only thing we can do is to ask ourselves what are the good and the bad sides of tampering with people’s genes.

                First of all, many diseases could be cured. There are a lot of conditions and illnesses that are inherited from parents and other relatives, for instance colour blindness or Huntington’s disease. With the help of gene therapy, these could be averted. As a result, people would live longer and the quality of their lives would be better.

                Additionally, parents would be able to choose the sex of their child. Therefore, they will be happier, since their wish came true. However, the number of girls and boys born would change and it may become a problem in some countries. Parents would also be able to change the level of intelligence of their children. The upside of this possibility is the fact that the more intelligent the child is, the chances of success in his or hers life are greater. Nevertheless, the parents would put a big pressure on their child because they would know its abilities. It would be better to say that with some solved, new problems will emerge.

                With the ability to alter people’s genetic make-up and their characteristics, comes the question of manipulation and abuse. A few mistakes can be made here and there. New diseases can be developed and be given to people”by accident” during gene therapy.

                There is no question that people will alter their genes to improve themselves. Consequently, many problems will be solved. In spite of that, many more problems will appear.

Look

This is my profile on a web page where you can dress models and a lot of stuff. You can see my creations there and make your own :) This one is one of my favorites.

Magic

It does exist.

Party people

There are 40-50 employees in my club, besides me, and most of them are extremely beautiful, both men and women. The ones that aren't are real pros and are the best at what they do. Anyways, as soon as they enter the building, all the people that work there immediately put a smile on their face and are ready to party and have fun. The atmosphere is always incredible because of the energy they have. It's very hard not to like them all. In my case it's hard not to like-like half of the guys.

When I started working there, I had no idea how I was gonna fit in. It turned out that all they talk and joke about is sex, so I figured I'll be fine. It has been two months now since my first day and things have been very interesting. My butt has been grabbed a million times and commented on two times that, and only in a good way. One time my manager and two of my colleagues asked me to come to the office. I started freaking out because I thought that I did something wrong or something like that, and they asked me to show them my panties. I was shocked. They made a bet about what kind am I wearing and they were willing to give me money to show them. I thought about it for a minute and I did it. My manager won the bet and I got my money as well.

All the time my coworkers tell me how great I look and hot I am. They also say what would they want to do with me and to me. They tried to talk me into it, but they failed. However I managed to talk them into showing me and few other people what they're hiding in their pants. A few of us were outside the office, five or six. I was waiting for my ride home and others were waiting for their wages. They were talking about penises and I was bored. So I suggested that they put their pants down so I could see and compare them. I didn't think they would do it, but they did. My favorite turned out to belong to a guy that I like most of those that were there, and he's in my top 5 colleagues. He's very confident, funny and handsome and he knows all the ladies like him. He wanted to have sex with me then, but I refused. Actually he said that few times before, but I didn't take him so seriously before. Did I mention he has a really hot blond girlfriend? I would like to have sex with him but not like that.

 Anyways, it's extremely interesting to work with all of them. I always thought working was all work and no fun, but here everybody is crazy and willing to play, and by play I mean have sex with me. I lost my train of thought now... I guess I should just finish my post here.



Peace and out!

Television cannot replace the book as a learning tool, which is why children are less well educated today.

Television is a very powerful thing. It can be useful as well as useless, but is it good to use it for educational purposes for our children and how much do they really learn from it? In my opinion, television can become one of the best learning tools for our children.

                First of all, books are tiresome for children. They are more interested in watching something, rather than reading and imagining. For them all the action is happening on screen, not on paper between letters. If a child is more willing to watch something, then it’s able to learn more.

                Additionally, pictures, sounds and videos are very useful in the learning process. They help children remember a lot of important information and fact. For example, when a child watches a cartoon or plays a video-game, it will learn a song, names of characters, where they live and what they do. If that cartoon were about Julius Caesar or an elephant, this child will know all the most important things about their life.

                The reason for children being less well educated today doesn’t lie in television as much as it lies in the quality of television shows. There is a lack of educational TV series, shows and cartoons. Nobody seems to care about what are the children actually learning from the cartoons they are watching. If the teachers and parents start choosing what their little ones are going to watch, everyone would be better educated and happier.

                We live in a world where television is a big part of our life. It makes us laugh, it makes us cry, but at the same time it teaches us as well as our children a lot of different things, and it is without question a very important learning tool.

Preparation for the IELTS exam

For some time now, I have been preparing to take the IELTS exam. I have only one month finish my studying and pass it. I need to score 6 or 6.5 so I can go to Australia and work and study there. I'm extremely nervous and I'm freaking out. And my mom isn't helping because she's also freaking out, even worse than I am. I'm sure I'll do fine on listening and reading module if I concentrate, but I'm not so sure about writing and speaking. In these two modules it depends on the topic I get. And you can see in this picture what do I look like when I have to write an essay, only I'm not blond and I sit on my bed. My sister found this picture somewhere and had to show it to everyone because it reminded her of me. Anyways, I really, really hope I'll do great on the exam.